so dont miss me this week in cardiff  next week in Glasgow then dundee and inverness and finally belfast  

 i cant wait  there is the best  bagel place in central station that sells amazing bagels so i wont have to live on salads and eggs and noodles  we dont have anything like that in bristol and i love bagels and so it s the highlight of my tours going to glasgow and getting my bagels

see you all soon

what i really hate the most about touring though and staying in hotels is that you cant cook 

my pet hate is paying 10 + room service charge for an omelette that you know only cost around a pound to make  i mean 6 eggs is what 1.50 i refuse to pay these price in fact  i actually make a game to see what i can find is the most expensive so far i have seen 10 tray service charge  and 19 for a burger and chips  or rather  gourmet burger and french fries if we want to be posh   

so i tend to live on subway salads  and fruit  and nandos chicken if i want a hot meal  So imagine my delight when reading on another forums one lady said that she boiled eggs in the kettle and snacked on them when she was hungry

and she got noodles and put them in a cup coverecd them with boiling water drained it and bingo noodle to go 

i have to admit i did think it wouldnt work but  it work it did  you can boil six eggs in a standard hotel kettle and the eggs came out perfect  ( i now have constant farts but at least i didnt pay 10 quid for  omelette 

i working on how to cook bacon but if anyone has any other suggestions on how  or what you can cook in a hotel room with just a kettle please  let me know

xxx Paris

so for the past few days i have been visiting the northwest  visting Chester which i love cos it so full of character   York which is totally  gorgeous city    Leeds   has  Harvey Nicks  and lots of hen parties  what more can i ask for

on my recent trip to  York though there was  a bloody fire in the hotel so the bloody fire alam went off in the hotel  can you belive it  it started going off and i thought  it was a test alarm

then after a few minutes i poked my head round the door to see the fire  doors were all shut and people were leaving their rooms

shit it really is a fire and im on the  4th floor and what do they always say  leave all your bags and valuable and leave immediatly  

fuck that i have 3 work phone, a lap top,  a kindle  all my work clothes thigh high boots and pvc along with bed ties and restraints and strap ons  so there i am the fire alarm  going off and im trying to shove my essentials bits and bobs into two bags 

when i finally get leave my room and get outside with the other guest  some who had been dragged out of the swimming pool all wet and now freezing cold to the arrival of no less than 4 fire engines 

it turns out that someone had been smoking and chucked the ciggie in the bin which set alight ,so set off the alarm  fucking stupid cow  she smokes i lose a booking and spend an hour freezing outside  in the end myself and 2 other guest head up to the local pub for a pint or was it 2 cant remember now 

but what i can remember is someone telling me that every time the fire brigade get sent out on a false alarm its around 500 -700 a unit 

i would hate to have that ladies room service bill  i wonder what fire engine cost as room service  although the firemen were hunky and i would have done room service with them anyday

I have been travelling by train a lot recently  and i cant belive the prices  98 pounds for a one way tick from leeds to cardiff   98 f…….. pounds  and your not even definalty got a bloody seat  so potentially  98 quid to stand 

stupidly i thought i got  bargain for 46 pounds  sadly after i paid for it on line i realised that it was for a child ticket   no way was i gonna pass for under 16 no mater how much anti ageing cream i use